{"id":2497,"date":"2022-03-18T17:37:14","date_gmt":"2022-03-18T17:37:14","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/?p=2497"},"modified":"2022-07-19T02:21:37","modified_gmt":"2022-07-19T02:21:37","slug":"how-do-you-feel-someones-vibe-through-text","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/how-do-you-feel-someones-vibe-through-text\/","title":{"rendered":"Can You Feel Someone’s Vibe Through Text ?"},"content":{"rendered":"\n

Texting and emailing has taken over as the primary means of communication in the 21st<\/sup> century. But has something gotten lost in translation?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When you\u2019re having a face to face conversation you\u2019re not just hearing words, you\u2019re sub-consciously reading body language, facial expressions, and tone of voice as well. These are key elements of communicating a vibe that can easily go unnoticed in text.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

While doing research I found that the average human speaks at about 150 words per minute in a conversation. But the average text is only 7 words. Less can be more in communication, but that\u2019s also a huge gap in ancillary, emotional, and contextual information.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

CERTAINLY VIBES ARE CARRIED THROUGH TEXT ALONE. BUT ITS NOT ALWAYS EASY TO TELL. FOR EXAMPLE, AM I SHOUTING RIGHT NOW,<\/strong> OR IS MY ‘CAP LOCK’ BUTTON STUCK<\/strong>?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In this article we explore expert opinions, perspectives, and research on communicating vibes, feelings, and emotions through txt and emails.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Let\u2019s Dive In.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Can You Tell Someone\u2019s Emotions Through Texts?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Yup : )<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But also<\/p>\n\n\n\n

NO !<\/p>\n\n\n

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Vibes do get communicated through text, but the interpretation often depends on the \u2018emotional filter\u2019 of the reader. A lot can get \u2018lost in translation\u2019, mis-translated, and completely misunderstood when it comes to interpreting the vibe behind the words on the screen.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Clearly texting has its advantages of instant and precise communication. Perfect for transactional conversations like \u201cwhat\u2019s the address of the party\u201d. In some places on the internet<\/a> and on social media<\/a> texting is the only option.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But when it comes to more nuanced conversations like \u201cAre you going to the party tonight\u201d a simple reply like \u201cYes\u201d can be interpreted as \u2018short\u2019 and \u2018uninterested\u2019. Or maybe the person was driving or in the middle of something else?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

As opposed to \u201cYea Definitely\u201d which conveys a more enthusiastic tone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

From a transactional perspective, both answers reply to the same question with the same answer. But from an emotional perspective, clearly just replying \u201cyes\u201d is a bit colder than replying \u201cyea definitely\u201d which implies a warmer emotional undertone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

\u201cHow Do You Read Emotions In Text Messages?\u201d<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

1. Assume Good Intentions (Remove Unconscious Bias) \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

When we mis-interpret text messages, its usually because of a wrong assumption. PsychologyToday<\/a> recommends trying the \u201cMost People Rule\u201d.  The \u2018most people rule\u2019 takes into account the bigger picture context where \u2018most of the time\u2019, \u2018most people\u2019 are acting with positive intentions. It is human nature that most people are well-intentioned.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And even if they\u2019re not, responding positively can\u2019t hurt.<\/p>\n\n\n

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Former CEO of Pepsi, Indra Nooyi, is an advocator and vocal leader in assuming positive intent saying<\/a> that\u2026,<\/p>

 \u201cWhatever anybody says or does, assume positive intent. You will be amazed at how your whole approach to a person or problem becomes very different\u201d.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Executive CEO coach Yuval Atsmon has found that our instincts can easily mislead us to a baseline assumption of negative (or even hostile) intent. This can lead a spiraling (domino) effect, as when we interpret negativity in text, we may naturally feel compelled to respond in kind.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Mr. Atsmon believes that assuming a positive baseline can be difficult, but as a \u201chack\u201d it\u2019s much easier to try and be aware and avoid negative assumptions. It doesn\u2019t have to be outright positive, but as long as you\u2019re not assuming negative, then that\u2019s a start.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

2. Explore The Emotional Undertones of the Words Themselves \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

As an expert in human communication and technology Dr. Tchiki Davis, Ph.D<\/a>. believes strongly in using the \u2018right words\u2019 with the right emotional undertones. When writing for Berkley University, Dr. Davis highlights the importance of understanding the emotional undertones when you\u2019re composing texts or emails, as well as reading text from others.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For example, the text \u201cI love this cute kitten,\u201d is clearly expressing positive emotions<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And  \u201cI hate this BS hard work,\u201d is clearly expressing negative vibes<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

 But if a text reads, \u201cThis cute kitten is hard work,\u201d it\u2019s a bit of a mixed vibe.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Dr. Davis uses a technique for detecting mixed emotions through tgext which she calls the  \u201cbag-of-words\u201d method.  Basically she looks at the undertone of each word separately. How positive are the words \u201ckitten\u201d and \u201ccute\u201d? And how negative are the words \u201chard\u201d and \u201cwork\u201d?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

By breaking this down, you start to get a feel that the kitten may be cute, but in this moment the sender of this text is feeling frustrated.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Now, if you add an emoji it can make all the difference. For example,  \u201cThis cute kitten is hard work \ud83d\ude2c,\u201d.Clearly the emoji communicates a feeling of frustration.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

3. Recognize the Balance of Communication Effort \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n
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Short text responses can be efficient, but they can also lack emotion and lack intent to engage with someone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Yes\u2026
No\u2026
OK\u2026
Got it\u2026
Sure\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Low effort texts could mean a few different things. Someone doesn\u2019t have time to text at the moment, but don\u2019t want to leave you hanging. They could be driving. They could be in a hurry, or maybe they just don\u2019t want to talk to you. Whatever the reason, respect the signal that they aren\u2019t in the mood for lengthy text messages at the moment.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

4. Use Your Existing Knowledgebase<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

I don\u2019t know about you, but I communicate through text differently depending on who I\u2019m texting with.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Aight homie\u2026
Sounds good\u2026
Sure thing\u2026
Yea Def\u2026
OK\u2026
Yes\u2026<\/p>\n\n\n\n

When I read texts from my Boss, my Finance, and my Dad I literally hear that person\u2019s voice in my head when I read their words from my screen. I know them well enough so I can interpret their voice, inflictions, tone, and general vibe quite well through text alone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But this only works for people who we know well and have an existing knowledge base of how they talk to pull from. With people we don\u2019t know as well it\u2019s best to just assume a positive tone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Reading Emotional Energy: The Basic Elements of Communication<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Behavioral science author Eric Jaffe<\/a> knows all too much that Emoticons and exclamation points only go so far.<\/p><\/blockquote><\/figure>\n\n\n

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Psychology professor Albert Mehrabian<\/a> has famously developed the \u201c7%-38%-55% Rule\u201d in the 1960\u2019s. Through extensive research Professor Mehrabian found that 55% of communication is through body language, 35% through tonality, and only 7% of communication was relayed through specific word choice.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Through text we can pick up on \u2018some\u2019 tonality, but we\u2019re clearly missing the 55% of communication expressed through the vibes of body language.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Body language is important in interpreting emotions, because most people aren\u2019t great at articulately expressing emotions verbally.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For example when someone says \u201cI\u2019m Fine\u201d. I could mean the person is totally fine. But depending on body language and tone of voice, it could mean \u201cI\u2019m definitely not fine, but I don\u2019t want to express myself and \/or burden you with my emotional baggage right now\u201d<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tough to tell with-out context over a text.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Pitfalls of Texting (or e-mailing): What Elements of Communication Gets Lost in Text ?<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n
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For people like me with social anxiety<\/a>, texting has been a godsend. But is texting really just playing into our inner fears? Has texting become a \u2018crutch\u2019?<\/p>\n\n\n\n

It\u2019s important to be able to read other people\u2019s general vibes and read between the lines of what they\u2019re really feeling instead of what they\u2019re telling you they feel. When we lose that 55% of communication through body language, its sort of like driving with one eye closed. It\u2019s still possible, but your ability to fully interpret your environment is hindered.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Here\u2019s the basic elements of communication<\/a> that you\u2019re missing out on when reading text messages and emails.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Posture And Position \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Posture and position can communicate a lot without saying anything. As a quick example, cross your arms<\/a> and say \u201cI guess\u201d. Now stand up with your hands in your back pocket and say \u201cI guess\u201d.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The words were the same, but did the \u2018vibe\u2019 or tonality of your message change? With your arms crossed saying I guess\u201d comes across as stern, while with your hands in your back pocket \u201cI guess\u201d comes across as a bit more open.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

This is just one example, but nuance like this is very difficult to interpret in text alone.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Gestures \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

General body positioning aside, specific hand, head, and foot gestures can be key non-verbal communication indicators.<\/p>\n\n\n

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For example, say \u201cyeah sure<\/em>\u201d while fidgeting with your clothes or while looking at your fingernails. Now say \u201cyeah sure<\/em>\u201d while nodding your head up and down.<\/p>

Saying \u201cyeah sure<\/em>\u2019 while inspecting your fingernails comes across a bit shallow. but by nodding your head, \u201cyeah sure<\/em>\u201d comes across more open-minded.<\/p>

Now try saying \u201cyeah sure\u201d while rolling your eyes. A whole new meaning.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Interpreting this in a text only conversation can be tricky depending on the conversational context.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Proximity And Touch \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s a difference in how a lot of us speak to a friend vs how we speak to a business associate (and for some us there\u2019s little difference<\/em>)<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But in general the average distance for conversations with business associates (or with people who you\u2019re not real familiar with) is 5\u2019 to 12\u2019 apart. While with friends and family the average conversation distance is 2\u2019 to 5\u2019 apart. And for intimate relationships the distance is 0-2\u2019.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

The closer you are, the higher the level of intimacy. This \u201cproximity\u201d can be conveyed in text by using the correct messenger to send the message.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

For example, sending a personal text is a much higher level of intimacy than sending a business email (and vice versa). Try to keep this in mind when communicating through text only.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Facial Expressions (Micro-Expressions) \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Micro-expressions can be difficult to read when you\u2019re standing in front of someone, let along over text. Often micro-expression go consciously unnoticed, but sub-consciously interpreted as a general \u2018vibe\u2019 or subtle expression of mood.<\/p>\n\n\n

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The easiest way to interpret facial expressions through text is through emoji\u2019s or : ) or lol, and emotional cues can go a long way in communicating and interpreting a vibe through text.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Clothing Choice \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

You shouldn\u2019t judge a book by its cover, but still your presentation can say a lot about you be it a good thing, bad thing, accurate, or not.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

A clean-shaven guy well dressed in a suit who tells a women she looks beautiful might spark an emotional reaction of blushing. That same guy, saying the same thing, but dressed as a crossing guard, might spark a stern rebuffing.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

There\u2019s not a lot of options as an alternative when it comes to purely interpreting text.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Tone Of Voice \u2013<\/strong><\/h4>\n\n\n\n

Tone of voice is a BIG<\/strong> one, because if done correctly, it can<\/em> be (somewhat<\/em>) translated into text. BUT IT CAN ALSO BE EASILY MIS-TRANSLATED!<\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\n

Anger and sarcasm are tough to read in txt messages and emails. It\u2019s all about specific emphasis on words, as well as eyebrow and eye movement. An exclamation point can convey being excited! OR ANGRY ! <\/strong>Or something that\u2019s urgent !!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Does the text \u201cCan you do that ASAP !!!\u201d\u201d<\/strong>  seem angry or urgent or both? How about if you say \u201cCan you please do that as soon as possible? Thx !\u201d<\/strong> same message, but different \u2018tone<\/em>\u2019. A more empathetic tone in my opinion.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Move Your Communication Beyond Texting<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Test messaging an emailing can be efficient, convenient, even addicting<\/a>, and sometimes a great way to express yourself in a manner that would be more difficult talking face to face. But text also has its limitations and downfalls.<\/p>\n\n\n

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A new study<\/a> from the University of Texas found that people are more likely to send a text or email because they felt a phone call would be \u201cmore awkward\u201d. Sometimes we also email or text out of convenience, but are we actually limiting ourselves by communicating too much<\/strong> through text?  <\/p>\n\n\n\n

According to the study\u2019s co-author Dr. Amit Kumar,<\/p>

\u201cPeople feel significantly more connected through voice-based media\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Think about how much more information can be gained  from a 4 minute conversation, as compared to 4 minutes texting.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Not to mention the increases person-person connection (bond) that is formed from talking on the phone. Talking instead of texting creates a more intimate connection, builds a stronger relationship, and conveys much more information.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

In one experiment<\/a>, researchers asked 200 people to predict what it would be like to reconnect with an old friend.<\/p>

\u201cWhen it came to actual experience, people reported they did form a significantly stronger bond with their old friend on the phone versus email, and they did not feel more awkward<\/strong>,\u201d<\/p><\/blockquote>\n\n\n\n

Final Thoughts: Feeling Out Someone Vibe Over Txt<\/strong><\/h2>\n\n\n\n

Catching someone\u2019s vibe over text is more difficult than talking on the phone, or having face-to-face conversations, but it\u2019s not impossible. The problem with interpreting vibes over text is a greater opportunity for misinterpreting or mis-reading the tone or intent.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Texting has become the norm, and common practice for new people getting to know each other. So interpreting text has become a new 21st<\/sup> century skill championed by Millennials and Gen Z. Interpreting tone, and catching someone vibe through text relies almost exclusively on context and background understanding.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

But when all else fails, phone calls, face-time, and \u2018old school\u2019 face-to-face communications form stronger bonds and communicate more information in almost all cases.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

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Loved what you read? <\/p>\n\n\n\n

Hit that share button and let the world in on the secret \u2013 we\u2019d be thrilled!<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Got thoughts? We\u2019re all ears for your feedback, corrections, or a good old chat. Don\u2019t be shy; drop us a line.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

And hey, don\u2019t miss out on our curated list of must-reads in the recommended books section<\/a>.<\/p>\n\n\n\n

Big thanks for diving in with us today!<\/p>\n\n\n

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\"\"<\/figure><\/div><\/div><\/div>\n<\/div><\/div>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

Texting and emailing has taken over as the primary means of communication in the 21st century. But has something gotten lost in translation? When you\u2019re having a face to face<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":2499,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[1],"tags":[],"acf":[],"post_mailing_queue_ids":[],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2497"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=2497"}],"version-history":[{"count":6,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2497\/revisions"}],"predecessor-version":[{"id":3018,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/2497\/revisions\/3018"}],"wp:featuredmedia":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media\/2499"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=2497"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=2497"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/theconsciousvibe.com\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=2497"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}